The 7 Worst Types of Drunk People
The 7 Worst Types of Drunk People
21 November, 2014When we’re not busy applying for internships, searching for grad jobs or studying for exams, you’ll usually find us students in a nearby club consuming copious amounts of alcohol. Everybody’s got to let their hair down from time to time, but some of us can be a nightmare after one too many cocktails.
- The Over-Emotional One.
Without fail, every night ends with mascara streaming down her face like wet paint and a story about a boy she liked during Fresher’s Week. Alcohol and emotions are never a good mix. She’ll find something to cry about every time you go out, and will probably always feel embarrassed about it the morning after.
- The Shrieker
“Oh my God, this is my jam!!!” precedes every song that comes on. They know the words to all the tunes and will make sure that you’re aware of this. If they spot somebody they haven’t seen in a while, they’ll be sure to raise the octave level in the room with their classic line: “I haven’t seen you in SOOOOOOOOOOO long!!”
- The Aggressive One
Accidently bumped into them whilst buying a drink? You’re asking for 12 rounds with Tyson. Usually found in the midst of a sweaty mosh pit, or under the restraint of a bouncer. Eager to rip the heart and soul out of anyone who so much as gives them a disapproving look.
- The Chunder Dragon
Self-explanatory. You’ve had to create an extra sheet on the Chunder chart to accommodate their ever-rising tally. Simply put, they can’t keep down their drink. They’ll most likely spend the latter half of the night with their head draped over a toilet seat. You’ll spend more money paying for their taxi fares home than you will on your accommodation.
- The Grump One
There’s always one. Alcohol turns them into a sleepy, boring fun Grinch. They’re out on a mission to eradicate smiles; if you’re enjoying yourself, they’ll make sure you know that they are most definitely not. They’ll moan tirelessly throughout the night and can often be found taking extra-long trips to the toilet or sulking on the dance floor. You’ll always ask yourself the question: “Why did you bother going out in the first place?!”
- The Crazy Dancer
Entertaining at first, but when every night out turns into a dancing contest, things become rather tedious. They’ll be sure to show off their wacky dancing, busting out moves you didn't even think existed. When they take “Drop it like it’s hot” too literally, you’ll be holding your head in your hands and pretending you've never met them before.
- The Drunk in Denial
They’ll spend the entire night trying to convince you that they’re “not even drunk”, despite the fact that they’re slurring their words and stumbling across the dance floor. After a while, it’ll get so annoying that you’ll just decide to agree with them to make them happy. Alas, they’ll still insist on informing you that they’re “not even drunk” until they eventually sober up on the cab ride home.
Darrell Coker is the II Brand Ambassador for the University of Warwick.
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